How Do You Know If You’re Bisexual?

Bisexual people are often subject to many biases and are discriminated against. It can even be more difficult for them to accept and understand their possible attraction to both sexes. How do you know if this is you, and accept it? Read on to find out more.

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Last December, INED published a study to better understand the profile of bisexuals. When it comes to the figures, more women declare themselves bisexual than men. Of the 27,268 respondents, 135 women defined themselves as bisexual compared to 94 men. However, it should be noted that many of the interviewees said they were sometimes attracted to people of the same sex but this had no impact on their sex or love life. 65% of women and 45% of men who said they were attracted to both sexes say they are heterosexual.

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Being bi, where does it come from?

As a reminder, one’s sexual orientation is neither a choice nor a fad, nor does it come from a perceived lack of affection at birth, nor is it genetic, it is in fact determined from birth. Some people are born with a predisposition to be attracted to men, others women, and for some, both. According to INED’s study, it is in their thirties that women embrace this part of themselves, as for men it is more in their 40s. In both cases, those concerned have known this since their adolescence, or almost always, but have had difficulty accepting what society considers to be a difference.

What does this consist of?

To be bisexual is not to take into consideration the sex or the gender of the person. It is also the opportunity to love people for who they are, and to fall in love with a person regardless of the sex that they were born with. However, in the current context where homosexuality is viewed negatively by some, bi people prefer sometimes to hide and to renounce this part of themselves which can ‘fail them.’ Attraction to one sex or another may vary between periods. It is of course possible to be attracted to a man and a woman at the same time.

How to know if one is concerned?

If you are bi, deep down, you know it. You know it when you fall in love with someone, no matter the sex, if you fantasise about them for example. The type of pornography you watch can also determine your sexual preferences. If a mixed couple or a gay couple have the same effect on you, you may be attracted to both sexes. Some people have preferences for one sex, others do not. There are no rules. Of course, you can watch gay porn purely out of curiosity without wanting to make love or go out with someone of the same sex. Or it is also possible to sleep with a girl without being bi. We must differentiate between curiosity and bisexuality. Discovery of one’s sexual orientation is what defines us.

How to accept and live with one’s bisexuality?

If we can give you one piece of advice that may seem easy to say, accept it. Do not be afraid to change your life or the lives of those around you because your personal growth is more important than people’s opinions. Some people live in denial all their lives and are not happy and in tune with themselves. Despite issues which can appear difficult initially, the goal in life is to find the key to one's own happiness, right?

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